202.5(-12lbs)

I was excited when I got on my scale this morning and it said 198!! That is the smallest number I have seen in years and it is under 200 pounds, which was a special goal for myself. I am not sure why. Most of the time, when my Mom and I would talk about what our weight was, I would always say, "the scale said 106." and my Mom would always ask, "You mean 206?". Oh, poop, of course I meant 206 or whatever number was showing that day, but I just could not wrap my mind around the fact that I was in the 200's. I did not ever really feel that BIG. Well, now I am not THAT big.(Still close, maybe, but on the way down.) **PS-The 202.5 pound weight and most other weights I report here are according to the scale at QWLC, which are always higher than my home scale, but are constantly showing the same weight loss.**

I went to try to find a new shirt for my upcoming trip to New Orleans this week and grabbed a medium, thinking, "This may fit???" Well, it did not, but I am getting there. I am really trying not to buy clothes since my goal is to be shrinking for a few more months and it seems that God has a sense of humor and keeps remind me of this as I have tried to find some new shirts at least three times since losing the first 10 pounds, and I just cannot seem to find anything that looks good. I am so used to shopping for clothes that hide my "problem areas", like empire-waist designs, with a lot of room around the lower belly and hips. I always joke that I could wear most of my clothes even if I were pregnant. Sad, but probably true. Now that I am losing the weight, I really want to embrace the fact that I do not have to cover the "problem" anymore. Well, I do still have to hide some belly FAT, but I will be able to wear more styles then I have been able to the last few years.VERY EXCITING!!!

I made a fabulous Veal Chop last night. Thanks to an idea from my friend Lindsay, I used some mustard, sage and tarragon to smear on each side just before removing it from the oven and it was outstanding! I am already planning to try the same thing on chicken tonight. I am going to use a different mustard and maybe a little crushed red pepper to add some spicy, but I am actually craving something that is healthy for me! I have also found that I crave yellow squash and since having asparagus last night, am also craving it!

As I mentioned earlier, I am going to New Orleans this weekend and am so excited to get away, however, one of the BEST things about New Orleans is the FOOD!! We are planning on going to Mother's, Court of Two Sisters, Clover Grill, the motto of the last place being: "We love to fry and it shows." Well, I LOVE things that are fried, but I am not really fond of the fact that fried food seems to show up on my hips faster than I can get out of the restaurant! We are also going to go to Cafe Du Monde, but I am not worried about the beignets. I will be just fine with a yummy coffee. I am worried about the Muffuletta at Central Grocery. When I was in NOLA last May, this was probably the BEST thing I ate all weekend! I have literally talked about it ever since. I can actually remember the feelings I had when I was eating it and the way that the oil felt dripping down my arm. There was no point in wiping your hands/arm/mouth until you were done eating because they would just get oily again. OH MY LORD, this is a good sandwich!! So, I am announcing to the World(or more appropriately you who read my ramblings), that I will have a Muffuletta. My goal is to only eat 1/4 of the damn thing, so I will be bringing 4 other hungry people with me, but I WILL be eating this yummy piece of Heaven and I will enjoy it!! I will behave myself MOST of the rest of the weekend and we will be walking EVERYWHERE, so I am only partially concerned for my shrinking ass.

I do plan on going to Pat O'Brien's, but not for their famous Hurricane(I hate them!). I am going to bid farewell to my fat-self since this is the place that it "technically" all started. A skinny me got engaged in October of 2004 in the piano bar at Pat O'Briens and I knew the moment it happened that I was not ready, but damnit, I did not listen to my intuition. I had a ring and I wanted a wedding. Thank God that it did not work out, but when I went to NOLA last May with friends, I returned to the site of the proposal and thought I would be fine, HAHAHA! I could not hold it together and ended up breaking down and hiding with my girlfriends in the bathroom for a bit. I guess this revisit will be a sort of test of my emotions(which I am well known for not being able to hide well). I feel pretty confident that it will be much easier this time. I know that I will probably always have the memory of that night when I go to Pat O'Brians, which is truly the only time I think about it, but I am ready to move on from that part of my life, and more importantly, to shed the feelings and pounds that I am still carrying around. I would say after 5+ years, I am good and done thinking about why things did not work and if I could have changed the way things happened. I have come to love myself again and I know that I will find someone who sees me for who I am and embraces these things(with all their challenges). I know that all of you who read this feel the same way and I just ask for your continued prayers. They mean the World to me and are so inspirational!!!

The pic attached is from my last trip to NOLA.